Independent Clauses | n. —unusual words about underappreciated music

Handjobs for Hobos-Right Now

June 1, 2007

handjobs-for-hobosHandjobs for HobosRight Now

Self-released

A musical juvenile comedy duo that doesn’t deliver much music or many laughs.

I don’t really know what Handjobs for Hobos expects me to write about their album Right Now. Here’s the facts: Handjobs for Hobos is a joke-y band composed of two guys who sit around playing pop songs with vulgar lyrics and just enough musical talent to wreak havoc on the musical world. They think their music is funny, and this short run (only 100 CDs) is mostly for those who (as the liner notes state) “laugh along with us.” It seems that they know they aren’t great (which kinda defeats the purpose of sending something for review, in my opinion).

Here’s my take on it: Each and every one of these songs is maimed by at least one major flaw, be it juvenile lyrics, unpleasant vocals, chronic underdevelopment of song ideas, or just plain stupidity. The very same things that these guys hold up as the funny parts of their music just don’t do it for me. I don’t like the fact that 6 of the 9 songs on this album attempt to make light of sex, or more specifically, the word “penis.” The only song with any lyrical quality at all is the highlight track “Alone Forever,” which seems to be a serious song about a lost love. I can’t say they’re the best lyrics ever, but at least they’re not “I wanna cum all over your face” (from “Bonana Song”).

There’s not really any redeeming musical value to this album except for “Burke the Jerk,” “A-A-Anime” and “Alone Forever” – and “A-A-Anime” is one of those that suffers from underdevelopment. It would be a great song if there were more to it, but right now it’s just an acoustic guitar line with some catchy stuttering spoken word over it. Again, “Alone Forever” is the only real song, as it has some nice mood-setting arpeggiating and an honest melody. If they move towards the type of songwriting in “Alone Forever,” they could get better. If they’re content to make some guys laugh, then they’ve accomplished their goal.

As Richard Nixon said, “People who like this sort of thing will find this is the sort of thing they like.” If you like juvenile humor delivered in a juvenile musical surrounding, pick up Right Now. If not, don’t get near this.

-Stephen Carradini

Stephen@independentclauses.com

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Stephen Carradini and friends write reviews of bands that are trying to make the next step in their careers.

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